my chemist and I
Our local chemist is just up the street. On our first night, upon arrival in Tulkarem, we stopped by there to get some toothpaste and similar accessories. To my delight I discovered an amazing soap collection in his shelves: one type of soap with a breast-enlarging formula, guaranteed result within a month, and another slimming soap, guaranteed result in five days.
I have to admit, it got me giggling. I read out the instructions on the back of the breast-enlarging soap to my colleague Artur: "Use this bust soap over your busts, massage your bust gently 2-3 minutes in circular motions (do not massage the nipples). Leave the soap for a while and wash away with water." All this to "enlarge, elevate and firm your bust". In a society where most bodies are well covered by clothes, it felt like reading out soft porn.
From the other side of the chemist shop, Kim sent us a look of warning. First night in town and already misbehaving, haram. I straightened my face out and plucked up my courage, bringing three bars of soap over to the counter. Our chemist looked at me solemnly: "This is very good soap," he commented, "it gives very good results. It will be good for you."
I haven't tried my wonder-soap yet. But to this very day, I swear, I have not set my foot back in that shop - I am too afraid he will eye me up and down and check for good results.
This is what I am missing out on:
I have to admit, it got me giggling. I read out the instructions on the back of the breast-enlarging soap to my colleague Artur: "Use this bust soap over your busts, massage your bust gently 2-3 minutes in circular motions (do not massage the nipples). Leave the soap for a while and wash away with water." All this to "enlarge, elevate and firm your bust". In a society where most bodies are well covered by clothes, it felt like reading out soft porn.
From the other side of the chemist shop, Kim sent us a look of warning. First night in town and already misbehaving, haram. I straightened my face out and plucked up my courage, bringing three bars of soap over to the counter. Our chemist looked at me solemnly: "This is very good soap," he commented, "it gives very good results. It will be good for you."
I haven't tried my wonder-soap yet. But to this very day, I swear, I have not set my foot back in that shop - I am too afraid he will eye me up and down and check for good results.
This is what I am missing out on:
4 Comments:
At 7:51 pm, Anonymous said…
You should really consider being a radio correspondent for BBC or Public Radio International. Your ‘punch lines’ (such as ‘checking for good results’ or ‘It will stay in my pocket’) wrap up your stories nicely. I know you want to make a difference in the world, and the power of the pen can be quite mighty. Just some food for thought.
-Lisa
At 8:54 pm, Helle said…
Du skriver så bra at æ detter av stolen i latterkrampe! :) Sånn såpe vil æ åsså ha!! hihi...
At 2:19 pm, Dovreflocken said…
Fantastiskt! Vilken dundersåpe! Veldig morsomt.
At 6:02 pm, Anonymous said…
du er så bra du!
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